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'Fakespeare' is just a bit of Facebook fun. People send me bits of source text and I convert them into something that looks like Shakespeare wrote it. Only better.

You can suggest something for me to work on if you want! Just send me a suggestion via Facebook Messenger or by email to: . Please cite the source and include the complete text you want me to work on.

Length? Something that would fit comfortably into a Facebook post and give people a bit of mild amusement.

What kind of source texts should you send me?

(1) Well known speeches from contemporary films and TV shows. But keep them family-friendly, please. E.g. the 'Do you feel lucky?' speech from 'Dirty Harry'; the 'It's actually cerulean' speech from 'The Devil Wears Prada'; the 'We live in a world that has walls' speech from 'A Few Good Men'. 

(2) Dry, dull, passages of purely functional, bureaucratic or administrative prose. E.g. part of the instructions for a washing machine, or the signage at a public car park, or part of the descriptive text for a box of paperclips from Amazon.

(3) Anything else that you think would be fun for me to convert to Fakespeare.

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Love to you all. If we haven't got silliness, we haven't got anything.

- Ian

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